Hello! It's been a while hasn't it? It's been nearly 6 months since I last posted anything. Where have I been? Nowhere exciting. This blog post is a little difficult to write, but it felt wrong coming back without writing some kind of update or explanation. This post is going to contain talk about mental illness so please don't read further if it's going to be triggering for you.
The first half of 2018 has frankly been awful. In the later months of 2017, my mental health was slowly getting worse, and it all reached a breaking point at the beginning of this year. I was no longer able to function as an adult. I couldn't work anymore. I had to move out of my beloved flat, and although I'm very privileged to be able to live with my parents until I'm back on my feet, it felt like the end of the world. I had to take another break from finishing my Master's Degree dissertation. My six-year relationship ended. I am glad to say we're still the best of friends and have a truly special bond. Everything important to me had crumbled away and honestly, I had given up completely. I had convinced myself nothing could ever get better, and there was no point to doing anything at all.
I was lucky enough to be seeing an amazing therapist, but was struggling to engage or really apply his advice through the thick fog and intensity of how miserable I was feeling. I was suicidal, scared, and desperate, not leaving the house, and just existing each day was so painful. I made one more attempt to get help, and went back to my GP, and I'm so glad I did.
I was prescribed a new medication, and although I was nervous as the last antidepressants I'd tried hadn't worked for me, I am pleased to say these ones have given me a new lease of life. I'm now more energetic, motivated, and laser-focused on my recovery. I'm ready to rebuild my life and to start really, truly living. I'm now able to enjoy things, not dwell on negative thoughts, and to engage with and use the strategies my therapist has taught me. I'm feeling so optimistic that my future will be worthwhile and good.
Which brings me to here! I'm back to blogging after a lengthy abscence. Hello! It's nice to be writing again. I'm going to be continuing to post about things I usually do - veganism, lifestyle, alternative, animals and such. I'll also be posting a lot more about mental health. Keeping myself mentally healthy is now a massive part of my life, so it seems natural I'd have a lot to talk about and share.
I'm really glad to be back to blogging and I hope you enjoy the posts I've got planned!